COTM | Ab-Fabs '07

Snappy Tomato Pizza - It's Monday! Thank ya for the birthday wishes last week! And a super-duper thank you to the Stanford '03 gals who donated a digital camera to Free Arts Minnesota in my name - the kids will LOVE IT! For those of you that tried to get a hold of me at work that day....well...you shoulda known better. I was no where near my job. Otay, moving riiigghht along... Well, this year has been full of off-the-wall stories. I'm sure that you all have read a few here and there, but I thought I'd compile a list of my ab-fabs. This will certainly keep you entertained...

• Ha Ha Ha! Merry Christmas! : Santas in Australia have been asked to say "Ha Ha Ha" because "Ho Ho Ho" may be offensive to women. Own the word ladies, don't let the word own you!

• $54,000 Scotch: Um....I'll take rail, thanks. Wait...I don't even drink scotch.
  

• Senator Biden on Senator Obama: "I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy, I mean, that's a storybook, man." Really Joe? "Articulate"?..."Clean"? Were there no other adjectives in your vocab that day? Was Jesse Jackson not clean? Al Sharpton? No?...

• Stolen Greeting Cards : So Mr. Postman stole greeting cards and took the money that was inside. Smart man. If he was really smart, he'd steal a credit card and gank someone's identity. I'm just sayin. If you're gonna do it, do it right. $50 birthday check or $5000 credit limit? Amateur.
  

• Who Wants to Marry a U.S. Citizen?: Your eyes are not deceiving you. This is the name of a TV show that hopes to get picked-up by a network. It works like this: 1) Guy is illegal immigrant. 2) Guy meets "American" Girl. 3) Guy and Girl "fall in love." 4) Guy marries Girl and gets Green Card. And if I may add, 5) Guy and Girl go to jail for fraudulent marriage.

• Andre J: I can't believe he made the cover of Paris Vogue. Wait. I take that back. I can't believe he made it in the New York Times !
  

• Virgin Atlantic Safety Video: Um....I really don't know what to say. This video creeps me out a little. Actually, it creeps me out a lot. I can't stand the Heathrow Airport. So if I was on a flight from the U.S. to Heathrow and this video played?! Well....lets just say you wouldn't want to be the one sitting next to me.
  

• Diamond Skull: I'm sorry what was that? "A platinum cast of a human skull encrusted with 8,601 diamonds" you say? Bought for $100 Million? You see, this is the kind of @&#!$!* that makes me angry.

• 

This stuff is just too good to make up folks. So what's your funny story? My advice to you is to make one up...and live it! Life's too short for it to be boring too. Just make sure someone is nearby with a camera. Words of wisdom, words of wisdom.

Have a great week!

p.s: Here's your MOS - ouch! He's gonna feel that tomorrow...or today.

p.p.s: If any of you would like to know more about Free Arts Minnesota, just get at me. It's a phenomenal organization that is near and dear to me.